Musis Respublica Floret
Al's World Tour - Mongolia
Cau h bauha yy lads n lassies!
("Hello" in Mongolian)
Well the white water rafting in the Altai mountains was one big WET experience. It absolutely pissed down. Reminded me of a wet weekend on Skye, which you'll be pleased to hear as I gather there's a wee bit o a heatwave in the UK (bugger).
Cheered up a bit when I saw the cool Ruskies in Irkutsk wearing the trendiest make of local denim, "EdWank"!!! You should've seen me trying to explain...!
Not content with freezing on the rafting trip, went for a swim in Lake Baikal which is meant to add 25 yrs to your life, but also remove your testicles with cold. Nice. Amongst the highlights were watching a flying cow. Cows do fly. When they get smacked by an articulated lorry right in front of the cafe where you're minding your own business trying to have a quiet beer! Images of Monty Python, "fetchez la vache!!!"
Arrived in Mongolia and straight onto a Russian Jeep driven by a man called "Shaggah". Shagger took us in his pimp wagon on a bumpy ride out to a nomad camp in the Gobi desert. The nomads took it upon themselves to slaughter a sheep in honour of our arrival. They don't have such things as abbotoirs here. Instead they insist you watch whilst they puncture the thing's belly, reach inside, grab it's heart and squeeze..... I wondered why my mouth was so dry and realised it had been open with shock for about 5 minutes!
When I'd got over the demise of Flossy, I introduced the nomad kids to the delights of the whoopee cushion!!! Essential travelling kit!!!
The Nomads passed on some interesting medical theories. Apparently drinking your mother's urine is meant to cure chicken pox, and jaundice. Tying a sheep's brain to your neck for a week prevents thyroid problems. I decided to give both remedies a miss, not fancying the novelty necklace, and piss-importing is probably illegal over here anyway.
Off to China tomorrow so better ditch the Free Tibet T-Shirt!
Laters !
Laters Devushkas!
13th July 2002
Alan Mitchell
RHS 1984 - 1990
NEXT PAGE --->China
- Dressed in traditional "Yom Kippur" styley Mongolian garb.